>+<+>+=-c e d r i c-=+<+>+<
Haiz....my brother my brother my brother....wasted my whole of 2dae on my bro.Did nothing but look after my bro and entertain him. Now I know why my mother always haf to scream at him...simply cos he never listens....
Actually if he's juz purely mischevious or naughty, it wouldn't be so much of a bother to me. What's worrying mi is that he's always in his own world~ Juz doing watever he wants, whether or not its right or wrong, or if it irritates others or not....worse thing is... my whole family seems to b giving in to him!!! Haiz...of cos larz...the only son, and the youngest of all, of cos muz dote on him. My stupid sister also forever giving in to him and give him everything that he want..Everything also nvm nvm nvm...
Not that im jealous or what, but somehow, I feel tat its juz not right, I mean like that how is he gonna learn?!? I know i am alreadi spoilt enough...but at the rate that he is being given eveything the way he wants....he's gonna b worse then mi!!! Haiz....
I also dunno y i feel this way larz.... all i know is tat he's my only brother and I love him a lot....Not because everyone say he's good looking or what. But...haiz....dunno how to say....I juz want the best out of him, juz want to make sure that he grows up to b somewan with substance and not juz an empty shell. My mother always say my sister dote on him more , treat him better tat type of thing, but if i do the same as everyone else, hu's gonna let him learn? Guess I juz haf to be the bad guy larz......No choice....
Juz brought him for his swimming lesson. As usual, he's sooo naughty, people swim, he play. Always get scolded by his coach. I brought my notes to study, but my attention was on Cedric. He's not putting in any effort at all lorz. Or should I say He's juz playing his way through. Can see he 'enjoyed' his lesson so much.... It worrys mi. I mean he said he's interested in it. But he's not putting in the effort to bring out the best in himself. At least from my own philosophy or mayb my own experience, I feel that if want to do soemthing, then be the best of it, or at least put in enough effort to say that I've done my best. I dun wan Cedric to regret like I did. Its gonna b too late..... I want him to be the best! Not juz brush through everything. I know the importance of enjoying what we are doing.....but its juz reality in this society that if u
r not up to it, u'r nothing! Its cruel but harsh! I know Cedric is smart and he's veri talented in many areas. Its obvious, and im sure im not the only wan hu realised it. All he needs is the proper grooming, which in the first place, he's needs to accept other people's teaching and comments, not explore it in his own world. Haiz....
I scolded him after his lesson and he got angry. Refused to hold my hand while going home. I know he dun like people to say that he's not good. I know he's sad. But I shall still believe that it will b a part of growing. Even if he dun understand it of hate mi for it...at least let it affect his life but make him realise the need to perfectise at time.
I dunno if im doing it the right way. Mayb I shouldn't b thinking in this way. Or mayb its because of the way I grow up that makes mi believe that the hardest road is the way to success. I dunno but all I know is that regretting is the worst feeling ever and should be avoided at all cost. Mayb I should juz try to tok sense to him. But with his stubborn character now from all the doting from everyone else, I dun tink toking sense will be efficeint. I dunno...juz hope that everything turns out well for him and he will understand it next time......
::__. eXquisTic . SoPhiStIcaTion____::
Saturday, September 04, 2004
